The new 5 part series at church is called "When The World Ends." I was excited about it, but sad because we will be missing 2 of the 5 weeks. I am pretty sure, religious or not, everyone wants to know what will happen to them the minute they die. Each part of the series is taught to us directly from the Bible and no opinions of the pastors are shared with us. I still don't know exactly what I have to do to get to heaven. My sister once told me that I can't get there just by doing good, but by asking God to take me there. I was so confused, hurt, and angry about this. I mean, so what she is telling me is although I may not be a criminal or a murderer, or steal, or do horrible, horrible things others do in this world, it doesn't matter. I still can't get there by doing good, staying out of trouble, paying my bills, or being nice to others. I mean what the heck. How will any of us get there then? I have been struggling with this concept for years, because I really really want to spend my eternal life in heaven, and not the opposite. Which is why I was excited to hear about this series. You can't put your name on the list, or make reservations, so what do I have to do??
I found the Pastor who spoke on Sunday incredibly touching. He spoke about his mom, and her last days. He was called to the hospital by the nurse telling him he needed to get there right away, "she only has a few hours." He stated, "it's kind of weird, everyone just watching her and waiting for the inevitable." Turns out his mom wasn't quite ready to go yet, they waited all night and in the morning she woke up, asked why everyone was staring at her, and wanted to order breakfast. She later went home on hospice care, and lived another 2 weeks. Her idea of dying was going to be at home and in a white night gown he said. He talked about her last hour before death, and how amazing it was. In my profession, I have been the one taking care of the patient before they have died. It's a humbling experience. I have been in a room with a dozen people, and just once I have been the only one in the room. The Bible tells us that angels come right on down and take you(r soul) to heaven. While most of us might think that this is weird or not right or made up. I can justify that the feeling in the room minutes before and after is just out of this world. It's super quiet and usually peaceful. You can't concentrate on much else when that person gives their last breath, and all you can do is bow your head. Charting and all the numerous other tasks you have to do can wait. It's almost as if you are giving those angels some space to do what they have to do. Comforting the family is perhaps the hardest job, you did not know this person like they did, and usually you just saw them in their final days, not ever when they were well. In any event, he said that one by one they went in to see her, his brothers and sisters, and last his dad. Once his dad was there, she passed. I can't tell you how often this occurs. Nothing happens until their other half is there, holding their hand. What a beautiful thing.
Needless to say, I was one big mess of tears. I couldn't help it. All I could think about is all the times I have already had to do this with my patients. And I thought about the day I will have to do it with my own parents and possibly my husband. (I hope I go first on that one!) Each and every person forward, I hope that they are right with God. That they talk and pray with him. That's really all it takes. I believe. I will try extra hard to listen for those angels as they take them up and away.
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