Love is...

"She's my second wife." said my patient as I asked him who was going to drive him home from his colonoscopy.  He sat there in a wheel chair, coat still on, hat still in place, spinning his ring around on his left ring finger.  The volunteer had wheeled him in.
"Your second wife?"  I said.  "Yah, that's what I said.  Second wife, but first love," he said.
"Ok, great. I see that you are on Coumadin.  When did you take that last?"
"Yesterday." he said.
"You didn't stop it, we usually have you stop it for 5 days prior to your procedure?"
"Well, I am not really sure if I took it.  It's in my case and I just took what was in the Tuesday slot.  Is Coumadin the white pill?"
Getting annoyed, I said "well let me just go ask the doctor if he wanted you to take it, maybe there is something that he knows, that we don't.  Would your wife know if you took it?"
 "No, she is certainly the better of the two of us.  She always has been, always will be, since the day I met her.  I was 19, she was 17.  I am glad that I found her again.  But she has her own problems and I have mine.  She takes care of hers, I take care of mine."

--Ok... thanks for nothing, guy.  I walk away, go check on this whole Coumadin issue, leaving the patient with a gown and yellow socks to change into.--

I return with my needed info and find that the patient is half way done, struggling to tie up his gown in the back.  I get behind him to tie it, and look down to remind him to take his underwear off, because after all he is having a colonoscopy, and he says, "I was just testing you to see if you would look."  Oh... dear... Lord.  I never get sick of seeing an 80 year old back sides, I'm thinking.  "Don't worry, I won't tell her."  "Tell who?" "My wife.... that you know... looked."

I knew he wanted to get back to talking about his wife... as he kept trying to lure me back in... so I asked him as I was starting his IV about this second wife of his who was sitting in the waiting room for him.  His face lit up, and the words just exploded out of him, as if he had never told "their" story to a soul before.  Although, I bet every dime I have... every server who serves them food in a restaurant, every bank teller that gives them cash at the bank, and every cashier at the grocery store has heard this story once, or twice.
He went on to tell me that he knew this woman was the one he wanted to marry in high school.  They both asked their parents for permission as she wasn't 18 yet, and both sets of parents said HELL NO.  (his words, not mine) They told them that they were too young.  And too this and too that.  So, he enlisted in the Army and said good bye to her.  They remained loyal to each other and wrote letters... "You know Erica, not even the Pony Express could deliver our letters, they had to go overseas!  It would take a month to get a letter over!"  So finally, he told her to have fun and to just live, that this was no way to be living.  And so they broke up, for lack of better terms, despite not wanting too.  She eventually married, and so did he.  She had 3 children, so did he... "and then guess what happened?"  "What!?" "Well, my first wife, she found someone who was better than me I guess.  And she left."  She left him high and dry he said, and "just so you know, I am not very fond of the guy."
He was alone for years, and woman he met and dated wanted him to "move in" with them.  He told me, "I'm just not that kind of guy so I never did it!"  And then just a few years ago, out of nowhere... "She called, RING RING (he actually did the sound of a rotary phone ringing), Hello, who's this... It's Ruth," he told me that he just cried.  She had explained to him that her husband just recently died... and he had explained to her that he was currently going thru chemo for prostate cancer.  Shockingly enough they both were brought back to the same area.  He raised his children in Italy, and she raised hers here.  They met up.  And then 57 years after the date that they asked their parents for their blessing in marriage, (and they said no) they got married.  That weekend they were going out to celebrate their 5 year wedding anniversary.

This story was just so touching.  He was very sure to tell me that he was blessed in his first marriage because she gave him his kids.  But to hear an old man say... my heart was never really with her, it was with Ruth... just made you want to hug him.

As a nurse sometimes, by force, we get caught up in the hustle and bustle of getting the patient in, and ready for the procedure that we don't get to listen to the human side of the patient.  The part that makes them, them.  And in the end, that's what I love about being a nurse.  The few times I actually have the time to listen.  You never know what gem of story they can tell.  And I am glad I let him tell it.  No matter how many times he has told it before.

2015, Welcome

Dearest Friends and Family-

The tree has been taken down, and there is no sign of Christmas anywhere in this house. Makes me sad?!  How the time does fly.  Pretty soon, I'll be 32, oh my.  Pretty soon, summer will be here.  And pretty soon the holiday season will begin all over again.  I sit in my living room, typing this to you all.  Wishing each and everyone a Happy New Year, and reflecting a little, on the last month.

As Decembers are for most people, ours was action packed!  Despite being annoyingly sick the first two weeks of it.  I managed to get the decor up... the gifts wrapped... and all the preparations under way.

Adam's Christmas party in the city was fun, the food was excellent, and the entertainment- always a hit.  Adam played President and I, First Wife, as we mingled with his co-workers, and they all one by one pulled me aside to tell me the JOY that is knowing Adam.  As if I don't know that my husband works incredibly hard all year to move his company forward.  They let me know it personally, which was very nice.  If only they could share the kind words with him too.  Perks of First Wife, I suppose.  Very unlike us, Adam and I chose to attend the after party for the second year in a row, and were partying till 3a.m.  I point this out because it never, EVER happens.

The next day we headed to Andrea and Dave's to have our Christmas celebration with my very best girls, Andrea and Amanda.  It's always fun, and happy when the three couples are together, and this year now, their children.  After it was determined that all 3 of us could drink wine and drink however much we wanted, we sat around and caught up on the happenings of the last few months.  There was a lot of playing with the kiddos and a lot of laughter.  We agreed to do a nail polish and sock exchange which by the way was excellent and fun to see how the other's interpret this idea.  Ahem, Andrea with the holiday socks.  Dave kindly slaved over a smoker all night and day to make us smoked pulled pork.  It was delicious.  Amanda, Ryan, and Julia left while Adam and I extended our stay till many  hours later, drinking root beer "beer," scotch, wine, espresso, and watching a German ornament thing spin and spin... Wonderful and very cozy.

Christmas Eve Service at church has to be my favorite service of the whole year!  You get to sing carols!  And believe me I sing them, loud and I sing them proud.  This boy in front of me caught my eye.  He was at that age where hanging with the family isn't quite embarrassing yet, and was super affectionate with his Grandma.  At the end we all sang Silent Night, (which Andrea, I have decided, is my ultimate favorite Christmas song, overall) one by one, we light the person's candle next to us.  There is nothing like getting a group of people singing this song, no music, no instrument, just voice.  It makes you think about the words and the meaning and perhaps give you an insight as to what it would have been like to be there in that manger 2000 years ago.  To make the chills on my arms grow more, the main guy who started the candle lighting's own candle burnt out when he was walking back up the aisle, and he didn't know it, the boy in front of me noticed and got out of line... tapped on his shoulder and kind of lifted up his candle as to say... here let me light this back up for you... he saw that his candle was out and said "thanks buddy."  It was such a heartwarming moment between a stranger and this boy.  It was the cutest and made my heart light and happy.

We hosted Christmas Eve at our house.  And while the avocados that I bought for the 7 layer dip were rotten, and I spent most of the day by myself prepping(Adam was bringing home the bacon at work), and I was anxious about serving 17 adults, 2 children and a baby... it all came together in the most chaotic way.  As it should be, as it will always be.  At 6pm... one by one the arrival of all of those I love walked thru the door one by one.  Loaded with gifts, with chicken wings, with cookies, with cheese balls, salads, cookies, and a white dog named Simon.  With 20 foot ladders, to clean a window we just can't reach.  Thanks to Jeremy our window is now Squeaky Clean, and the bugs were vacuumed up from the ledge.  The chaos of a normal family Christmas Eve had begun.

I was not exactly the sweetest kid growing up.  I cried a lot and was very clingy to my parents.  So I try and understand when kids are shy and don't want to come by me and try hard not to take it extra personally.  One of my GREAT nephews who never ever talks to me or will even look my way  sweetly came over after we had waited too long for his taste and said "may we open presents now?"  I was so shocked and said, "of course."  This was my Christmas miracle.  Not to mention it takes me back to the days were Rachael and I would beg to open presents, two minutes after the food was served!  The tables have certainly turned!!!

Elliot, Alexander, and Marshal

My family was extra generous this year with the gift giving.  I can honestly say, I loved everything I received.  Thank you so much for all you did, for the positivity, and the love.  You all are the best.  I know that families are growing, and there were other places you could have been on this night.  But I am glad that you were with us, in our home.

Since we are childless, Christmas morning makes me sit back and think about Christmas as a kid.  When Santa was real, and what I worried about was far from what I worry about now.  I think about the craziness of what Christmas morning involves.  Waking up early, opening the tons of gifts, playing with said gifts, and then eating.  Lots and lots of food.  My husband was extra good to me this year, and I received lots and lots of goodies from him.

Calls were made to our far away family... Linda, John and Barbara, Morgen, and Brenden.  We can't wait to see you all in 2015.  Great to hear your voices and open our wonderful gifts from you all.

And then for dinner we went to Aunt Emilie and Uncle Bill's house where we enjoyed unlimited tenderloin, potatoes, beans, corn, desserts, shrimp, gravy, Coke, dips, and Grandma's cranberry Jello mold... which I tried again for the first time since SHE made it last.  We will leave the reason why out of this story.

And as always, Auntie Em never forgets and as long as you return your stocking from the previous year, you are rewarded with another the following.  One for Adam, one for me.

A few days later we spent time with Mike, Alisa, Gavin, and Baby Tessa to celebrate Christmas.  The boys exchanged beer, and Alisa and my theme for this year was a necklace exchange.   Our new year's resolution is to "Embrace Gold."

New Year's Eve again, and as always was low key.  It was my holiday on call at the hospital.  I was lucky, no one started bleeding, no one got anything stuck in any gastrointestinal related orifice, and everything was quiet.  It's a pleasure when the stars align.  

"May your coming year be filled with magic and dreams and good madness.  I hope you read some fine books and kiss someone who thinks you're wonderful, and don't forget to make some art... write or draw or build or sing or live as only you can.  And I hope, somewhere in the next year you surprise yourself." -Neil Gaiman

Cheers to surprising yourself-

-e-

Things, I am looking forward to in 2015

Favorite Things 2015

 Rachael and I hosted the Third Annual Favorite Things Party this year and again, it was a huge success.  We decided to keep the total number of guests at 12, inviting all of those that returned our 2nd year, to the 3rd year, and threatening that if you can't come this year, the list would go back to those who were at year #1's party and couldn't make it to year #2.  You got that, it was the fairest way.  Except for... every single person who came last year, returned again... and very eagerly for one of the best ideas EVER.

I think this was by far my favorite of the 3 parties.  I don't know if everyone was just more INTO it with whooping and hollering this year and are feeling much more comfortable.  The first two years I doubted that anyone had any fun and if it was even worth it to do it again.  But I think some of these ladies are marking it down already now for November 2015.  I don't know if it's just fun, intermingling my friends with Rachael's friends.  They may not know each others names by heart, but they know what they brought the year before.   "I don't remember your name, but you brought the EOS lipgloss, right?"  I don't know if my house just feels more like a home now... with paint on the walls and furniture to sit on.  Or if it was just a mixture of it all.  I just had the most fun this year.  People are really thinking up some of their truly favorite things, and putting a lot of thought into it, and it's just fun to see.

We may not live on Oprah's budget, but we still have a good time!!!

Until next year!

TCL

Meet Tessa Christine, the newest little person in our life, born October 16th.  Here she is pictured one day old.  Isn't she precious?  We can't wait to watch her grow!

Congrats Alisa and Mike!

And a big congrats to big bro, Gavin, who insisted on naming this child Erica, however it went in one ear and out the other of his parents.

Puppy Birthdays

Lucas

 We celebrated two pretty special birthdays this month.  On October 4th, our little Cockapoo turned five!  We celebrated with unlimited bones, a can of dog food, and a new toy that he destroyed in a matter of one hour!  October 15th marked 5 years of having our Florida dog.  We rescued him and never turned back.  The date is now his birthday, we think he's 12.  He celebrated the same, but his dog toy is intact and he carries it everywhere.

"A new dog never replaces an old dog, it merely expands the heart!"

Charlie

Josh and Christina's Wedding

2 weeks ago, Ashley came for a visit to Chicago to see her friends Josh and Christina get married!  I was her date!  I was super excited to be her date because I got to see these two love birds get engaged  last year in front of Cinderella's Castle in Disney World,  It was another match made in Disney, so of course I wanted to be apart of all of it!!!!!!  To see it come full circle was awesome!   And hey, I would like to say I gained two new friends!

I made a ridiculously good lookin' date, if I don't say so myself.  

Besides the wedding, Ashley and I passed the time, watching TV, looking at each other's Pinterest accounts, sunbathing, and looking thru all my photo albums.

MoJo's Wedding

My nephew Jordan tied the knot September 20th.  Adding another Morgan to our lives... we have Erica's Morgon, Adam's Morgen, and now Jordan's Morgan.  All spelled differently.

The wedding and reception was located at my sister and brother in law's home in Rochelle, Illinois.  

While the day started out rainy, the skies cleared and the sun came out just in time for them to say their "I DO's."  They wrote their own vows which was pretty awesome.  It had to have made even the most stoic person give a smirk, a smile, and maybe even a tear.

They each had their siblings stand by their sides, and their parents walked them down the aisle.  

Ryan, Rachael's husband, was the officiant and did a great job.

Afterward, cocktail hour started and this was the first time Adam got to see and hold his great nephew Elliot.

the cake

Can you tell these two are related?

"Hey, Erica, hold Elliot for a minute.  I'll be right back."-Rachael

  Half an hour later she comes back, after I already handed him off to Dad, bottle finished, but too afraid to burp him myself.

Have you seen a cuter couple?

These are my siblings... shockingly, together for the 3rd time in less than 2 years.

And that's me and my very own Maid of Honor.

I couldn't be happier adding Morgan to our family.  I know I am just the Aunt in the whole scheme of things, and no one cares what I think, but Morgan adds a special flare to any gathering.  She's cheerful, warm, and caring.  The two really complement each other quite nicely, and I am just genuinely happy for them.  

Cheers to many many years of LOVE and HAPPINESS, Mr. and Mrs.!